Becoming a dad can sometimes require us dads to up our game. This needn’t send a shudder up the spine – as the first baby won’t transform life beyond recognition. If you’re active outside of home, with sports, hobbies, social life, as well as work, you might need to make some choices or changes. No need to throw your toys out of the pram though. ‘You-time’ won’t disappear when the baby arrives. Your fellow dad buddies will readily understand, while the non-dad buddies might be trickier.
Don’t isolate yourself. It’s important that you hold onto your pint night with the lads or whatever your thing is. Even with 2 children, I found that there was still adequate ‘me-time’ available. But pregnancy number 3 was a game changer. ‘Me-time’ evaporated overnight. The workload became constant and totally overwhelming. I had to flog my boat around then. Literally. That was a ballbreaker..
Tom Evans is a Counsellor & Psychotherapist in Midleton, Cork, Ireland.
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